With more screen time comes more mental load and chatter, increasing our mind’s need for care.
Read MoreQuick question: How often do you find yourself spiraling down into fear? If we're all being honest, the answer is probably quite often. I know it is for me. Especially since becoming a parent I've noticed my mind jumping to terrifying scenarios just when I look at my beloved children.
Read MoreQuestion: Do you ever beat yourself up for not having the immediate solution to solve all your problems? Or for the fact that you're only willing to reach out for support once it feels like life's about to fall apart?
Read MoreAccessing that humanity is no easy thing. For many of us, it takes a tremendous confluence of events and emotions to be shaken enough to cry. My invitation and challenge to you is, when the miracle hits and the tears finally come, care for yourself enough to let them flow. Let yourself feel all that comes up, knowing that no feeling lasts forever and on the other side of that emotional wave is clarity and action, just waiting for you.
Read MoreNo matter what topic my clients and I are covering in our sessions, be it relationships, career, joy, diet culture/mentality, or parenting we somehow always come back to the foundational theme of how they are caring for themselves through their particular situation.
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Close your computer. Stop scrolling Instagram. Hide from your family and just sit. Then breathe. Then notice. In this stillness is where you will feel the tug, the call, for what needs care in your life.
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When I started my health and life coaching practice 12 years ago almost all my clients wanted to lose weight. Some wanted to lose just a few "pesky" pounds. Others wanted a complete body overhaul. Together we'd start with the basics: how they were eating, exercising, sleeping, hydrating.
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As a mother, managing this hunger is a daily dance as we can’t always put ourselves first. In fact, we often need to put children first and in doing so get further away from our own feeding and need for care.
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So the question arises, is there life in the middle? And if so, what the hell does that look like? And yet because life is constantly changing, constantly in flux, throwing you from one end of the spectrum to the other, there is no living permanently in the soft middle. The middle is only a place we visit, an inner sanctum we’re continually called to come back to, to find our ground, our solace, our resilience and our relief.
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It’s not our fault that we’re control freaks. Besides it being a natural desire to feel safe and secure, controlling ourselves is often the only way to live the misguided ideals of beauty, accomplishment and success that have been shoved down our throats since birth.
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How many years have you lost just being so hard on yourself? It’s an interesting phenomenon. We tell ourselves that time flies, that it’s slipping through our fingers, that we must be as productive as possible to make every single minute count. And yet how much time do we continually lose to criticizing our bodies, denying our desires, questioning our true experience, and worrying what people think of us?
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You can't go back to the way you were, for you are forever changed, and while you know you aren’t who you used to be, the newest version of you is still emerging. Now is the time to nourish the well of creativity, not to hastefully tap it again.
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You do not need to chronicle all you did today to know you're deserving of love. You do not need to catalog how hard your day was to prove you're worthy of care. You do not need to name a single action to know you're entitled to rest.
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Not a day goes by when we don’t experience some sort of a challenge. Which makes sense as challenge is part of being a human on this planet. No one “rides for free” and thank goodness for life’s challenges that make us stretch and grow.
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There are times as a mother when I literally forget who I am. Times when I get so sucked into the laundry list of life that I struggle to locate ME. When that happens I plop myself down and write. I ask and answer big questions and in the writing, I’m always brought back home to myself.
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Pause is imperative to creating the life we want. In fact, it is the foundation on which our dreams and actions are built as it’s only when we quiet that we can hear the wisdom within, the wisdom needed to powerfully guide us into the coming year. Here is a simple ritual that will help you both honor the year you’ve had and consciously connect to how you want to experience the year to come.
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May she look at them and say, "My mother taught me to accept my body as she is. To trust her changing, flowing nature. I choose body reverence over body revulsion and I will never abandon myself or my body for whatever false love "perfection" brings. My body is my own and not open to commentary."
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Some little shitty voice tells me that though nursing, clothing, washing, cooking for, diapering, and feeding my babe is important, it's not AS important as my work outside of the home. It'll never be as important as the work that brings in cold hard cash.
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Often when we’re in chaos, whether in our personal lives or triggered by the state of the world, we lose contact with our center, that sacred place within us that houses our resilience, peace and joy.
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How quickly we forget the invaluable effort put out by our arms, our eyes, our legs and our lungs every single day. We forget about all the love our hearts give, all the solace our words bring, all the strength our simple presence offers those who need it.
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